Didn't need flashing lights?  Pretty sure the halucinogens from the 60s provided all sorts of flashing lights.   :D

You don't teach kids by force, you teach kids by encouragment & discouragment.  Free time is important and it's not free if they're not allowed to spend it as they wish.  The guy is 14, not 4.

Yes excessive use of anything will likely be detrimental in the long run.  I'm sure those video game studies don't mention reasonable use.  It's Tipper Gore & Rock'n'Roll.

If he brings the game, maybe he'll choose to do other things instead of play it.  Maybe it will piss rain for 3 days and he won't think camping sucks because he has something to occupy his time.  Maybe he'll play it constantly until the batteries die.  One thing I can guarantee you is that he won't be complaining about some totalitarian regime stuck in 100 year old mentality, which is what will happen if he's restricted from simple & harmless freedoms.

Geeze look at me being true to my handle.