The worst I can think of is I joined a group that was going and we took two vehicles, she was in the same with me. As we approached the Forest lake exit she said ”aren’t we going to stop for something to eat?” We stopped so she could get something. Next she wanted to stop at the Wyoming rest stop so she could go to the bathroom. When she opened her mouth to ask if we were going to stop at the Moose Lake rest stop, we all beat her to the punch, by this time everyone wanted to get away from her. It was at this time I realized I was probably the one who was going to get stuck paddling with her. Everyone else had a paddling partner!

I did manage to avoid sleeping in the same tent as her the night before we left the landing. I slept outside under the stars to avoid her. It was obvious I was also going to be sharing a tent with her. I prayed it would not rain so I could continue sleeping outside. It was fall, so no worry about bugs.

When we finally started paddling it wasn’t as bad as I imagined, her paddling was so weak and ineffective I just paddled as if she weren’t there. She made for great ballast though, only a little over a hundred pounds so I placed a pack right behind her as a backrest which turned out to be good because she quickly tired and complained, no make that moan, about a sore back.

We were always the trailing canoe, everyone else had two able paddlers, and one of the guys who thought he was Bill Mason or maybe Paul Bunyon suggested that we switch partners. He quickly fell behind and when we had to paddle a small creek with a class I rapids she threw down her paddle and grasped the gunwhales so tight her fingers turned white. The front of the canoe caught a rock and they spun around and dumped. Now we had to listen to her whine about being cold. We made camp and put her to bed. I was now joined by the two other people from “our” tent who did not want to sleep with her. We plotted different ways we could kill her and dispose of the body without getting caught until we fell asleep.

When we finally got back to the take out she proclaimed “I’m never going on a canoe trip again” Everyone looked at each other thinking the same thing “we’re not ever going to ask you again” I finagled a way into the vehicle she wasn’t riding in on the way home.

I guess I didn’t learn my lesson, a few years later someone asked me to join their trip to fill out an empty spot. It turned out I ended up with the male version of this woman, but that is another story.